TEMPERANCE BEVERAGES: Seedlip makes it big, and we take it easy
You can't beat non-alcoholic distillations — so Adam McDowell shows you how to join 'em
In case you missed this month’s big faux-booze news, Seedlip has sold to Diageo, the world’s largest distiller, for an undisclosed sum.
The Diageo deal means copycats will follow, and non-alco spirits may indeed already be too big to fail. So it’s time for us all to decide whether there’s a place for such products in our lives. Skeptical? You wouldn’t be the only one.
In case you’re not familiar with Seedlip despite the flood of coverage that greeted it upon its arrival at posh Canadian grocers a couple years back: It’s a distilled product flavoured with aromatic botanicals. A bottle costs $45ish, and contains zero alcohol.
That might make it sound like non-alcoholic gin, but you’re not supposed to call it that — and fair enough, it doesn’t smell or taste like gin anyway. (Ceder’s, another non-alcoholic botanical distillate, does call itself a gin; it hasn’t quite stormed the Canadian market yet.)
Anyway, as Forbes reported:
The clear signal from Diageo is that they now believe there is a big market opportunity in premium non-alcoholic drinks; that Seedlip is a “game changer” product innovation …
The acquisition comes five years after founder Ben Branson quit his job in marketing to follow his entrepreneurial instinct, experimenting with distillation and botanicals on his family farm.
Let’s linger on that morsel of information and just imagine the scene.
Irritated middle-aged woman: Benjamin! When are you going to get a real job again and stop splashing about in the shed?
Ben Branson: I’m not splashing about, mum! I keep telling you. They’re me
botanicals
.
… and imagine him painfully explaining over and over again: “Yes, it’s 25 quid a bottle. No, there isn’t any alcohol.”
Ha ha, anyway. Joke’s on me, because people did buy it. Lots of it I guess.
Forbes again:
… founder and teetotaller Ben Branson, 36 …
THIRTY-SIX? [spit take] Sorry, I have to stop reading before I smash something. I was already riled up by the Seedlip website, which is frankly just dripping with GOOP-like, lifestyle influencer pretension: “Seedlip is a Nature company on a mission,” [gag] involving a “bespoke” [ack; why?] approach to distilling, et cetera.
Bunch of wankers, amirite? Rich ones, too, now. So you can probably guess what I think of Seedlip …
Erm, I actually really like it. I think they smell nice: the herbaceously verdant Garden 108; the Spice 94, redolent of allspice and cardamom; the citrusy Grove 42. And there’s a new range coming, too, but we can discuss later.
And Seedlip fills a need. Sometimes you want the bitterness and complexity — the sophisticated bite — of an adult beverage, but without the alcohol.
But how to drink it? I don’t believe Seedlip is really supposed to be consumed neat. You’re meant to mix it. At the same time, the published cocktails that incorporate Seedlip tend to be complicated, bartendery stuff (I should know). Trouble is, those of us schlubs playing the home edition of the game will not want to futz around with these on a Wednesday night.
My answer is to come up with easy mixes for Seedlip beyond ordinary tonic water (which seems obvious given how often it has been compared to gin).
One evening last summer I wanted to fix a spritz-like drink, but an alcohol-free one. So I tried Spice 94 with Crodino and a twist of orange peel and found that it was tasty. As chance drink discoveries go, it’s no Flaming Moe — for one thing, it won’t ignite, as it lacks alcohol — but it isn’t bad either.
So, having sought the advice of Canada’s Seedlip ambassador, Sarah Parniak, I’ve been experimenting with easy mixes lately. I share some good ones below.
First, the general parameters: I tend to add two parts mixer and one part Seedlip to a rocks glass with ice and add a squeeze of a suitable citrus fruit. Eyeballing, as opposed to strict measuring, is more in line with the spirit of the exercise. Use a small glass — you wouldn’t want to overdo it and set yourself on the road to ruin.
The Garden one, with its aroma of peas, is quite refreshing with an elderflower soda, such as the one made by Fentimans. Add a squizz of lime.
Garden 108 also makes for a lovely smash-like concoction when mixed with Double Dutch Cucumber & Watermelon Tonic. Nice little spring-like little bouquet of aromas you’ve got yourself there. I added fresh basil and a cucumber spear, but it would have been quite potable without.
As a natural substitute for the whisky highball you’re not having for whatever reason, try Spice 94 and Fever-Tree Smoky Ginger Ale (another wonky idea of a product that actually works). Twist of lemon.
A splash of Grove 42 lends a juicy tang to dandelion and burdock (if you’re not familiar, ask a Brit). Lemon.
Finally, Grove is quite good with Fentimans Curiosity Cola, and probably any other fancy and/or cane sugar-based cola. Add lime (optional).
I’m certain there are many other great combinations awaiting discovery.
You may be wondering where one actually finds mixers such as these. Gourmet food stores are a good bet, but I also located the smoked ginger ale at my local Sobey’s, so maybe fancy pop is going mainstream too. That being said, I live in Roncesvalles, a Toronto neighbourhood that exhibits one of Canada’s highest concentrations of people who would use the word “bespoke” unironically. Your mileage may vary.
Whatever mixers you try, remember: Just because a brand’s identity is nudging you to be a perfect Gwyneth type doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it in your usual lazy, dissolute manner. Cheers to you, dirtbags!